that I inadvertently became
On another's time
This is a very absorbing subject. There is much on this too. In my experience I have had a very varied time in the professional intimacy, beyond the words in those theory papers.
It is no different to all those other medical appointments one has. The dentist who looks in your gob, breathing over you, albeit through a mask these days. The eye test where you can smell, what they had for lunch. Yes, a very interesting time indeed.
Those testy moments on the first meet. The ones who lay the boundaries, before you utter a word. The ones who sit down in a more relaxed level with you. The old school, the bear hugs, asking permission first. The getting in a car with many different personnel at one point.
That normality of getting in those different cars. One example of going to a place, to get out and about to have a pot of tea and sharing a plate of toast. And then the abnormality, in the high probability, in never seeing that person again.
It was as surreal, as in my surreality. The passing of much in patronising, boundaries, the obvious, the silent, and more. The usual in that for their ways. For me a disjointed time in my own own social concept, lost in the muddle of a mess. The grappling with life back, that none could do for me.
I had to do it myself. The connection with strangers, in one sided times, the going through the motions, so lost on so much ...
And how do you connect to people who say they could never not drive. Or are so rigid. The passing of inadvertent words in times mad, sad and bad ...
The worst when someone is elsewhere and they fade off into a world of indifference and not actually listening, within your time.
The NHO used to have a side kick of a youngster on their training program, visit me. They eventually did not shadow. They would be texting while a client poured out their heart. They were let go.
The more time passes. The less I would like to do, what I originally thought of in a vocation. I am glad I did not rush into anything too, too soon.
We are all capable of not listening or inadvertently saying something. The trouble now, I will know more how it feels.
